The world has changed.
Its been a long time and a few false starts. I’ve been away from this for far too long. I look around at the world around me, and I have to say: I’m not impressed. In fact, in some cases I’m down right pissed. People all over the planet at each others throat. An election coming up that has spiraled way out of control. Sum it up, hatred is at an all time high. The only way I see to fix it, is to put forth some positive energy into the world. That is indeed what this world needs, positive energy. It needs a lot of it too.
In truth, I’ve had the itch to come back for some time now. I didn’t know if I could though. I kept thinking i was ready but I would sit down at the console, and nothing. Or an excuse. Id thing of something else that i could do. Trick myself that their was something I needed to do. I can’t do that anymore. I started this site with a few things in mind. They are as follows:
- Spread my madness throughout the world. A message that needed to be heard. Spread stories that needed to be told
- Do something to leave a mark. Give my own little one something to look at and shoot for.
- To make an impact on this world, even if it’s a small one. Everything little thing matters to someone
Three things that needed to be that I turned my back Encyclopedia Psychotika? Answers simple, a broken heart. Losing my Seras was a blow I wasn’t prepared to take. It took a lot to recover from that. A lot of soul-searching. A lot of… everything. A Chehsire Cats mind is not an easy thing to repair. Nor is the heart. I still miss her. I’ll always miss her. She was a large chunk of my life. At the end of the day though, she gave me the best gift in the world. My little toon Jazmin has helped to fill the void and ground her dad when needed.
Now that I’m back though… I have a problem. Where do I start? Pick up where I left off? Treat you all to some stories? I guess we will just have to sit down and see what comes out. We will just see where… or when…. we will end up. See you real soon….
I sit in the MORTIS. Looking around as the dust settles. It has been a busy year…. Had it been a year? No longer than a year! Traveling does such things to the mind. Times, Space, Dimension jumping can scatter the most skilled mind. Let alone one as long scattered as mine. The life of a Cheshire Cat is often not an easy one. I’ve been sitting here for while looking at the wreckage. The consoles all ash marked. The controls taken apart. Everything half-fixed. It’s time to breathe some life back into this old thing. Maybe fixing the ship will help fix the pilot.
I have such stories to tell you all. Such adventures. Hell, Halloween Horror Nights 25 starts tomorrow and I owe you a review from last year still. So many movies have went untalked about. Such current events not discussed. I’ll just say those are probably best not talked about. It appears as if this world has completely lost its mind. I suppose my madness is not the only brand out there. Some people should really watch what brand of madness they subscribe to. After all, some people are out just to watch this world and its time line burn. Normally this wouldn’t be an issue, but me and the little bit just so happen to call this plane home. Can’t allow it to go to complete shit now can we. She’s a little too fond of this dimension.
I get up from many chair. It’s so dark in here. Lets take a look outside. Opening the door i look down at the Earth. So peaceful from way up here floating in orbit. Scanning the land, I have to say I don’t like what I see in a good portion of it. I’m done with the negative. The negative side of life has choked me out for far too long. I stretch my arms and crack my neck. As my neck makes a loud pop, my hat falls. Man is it dusty. I slap the dust off and place it on my crown. My eyes widen as I run inside. A grand idea crosses my mind. I’ll throw this switch, and turn these knobs! Pull down these levers and turn on the these breakers. The computer console whines to life. Hmm, yes! These commands. Lets change the look of this ol girl. Lets make things look new…NO! Classic. Yes, classic Victorian…But with a bit of pirate. Like my old ship! And with just a dash of steam!
The room lights up as everything goes blurry and fades away. The old, burnt, broken, and busted gives way to beautiful wood and brass work. everything lit up with warm glow. And the gears! Gears! Beautiful Brass Gears! Time to set a coarse…But where too? Maybe we will visit Jack. Jack and his wonderful Carnival of Carnage. Full Report on whats going on with Halloween Horror Nights tomorrow…. I’m back my Cheeky Monkeys! I’m back and its time to switch this life into full overload.
As most of you know, my 2014 was a rough year. A relationship of years dissolved right before my eyes. It was crushing. I had held onto it for so long. In hind sight there were a lot of signs I should have just let it go. Just let it end. Maybe if I would have it wouldn’t have been so hard. I guess the small optimistic side of me just took hold too hard. That started a bad downward spiral for me. One that I kept the magnitude to myself.
I endured a lot over those next couple months. Watching my once fiance with another man wasn’t easy. It was all right in front of my eyes and in the closest of fashion. That was my mistake. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to be subjected to that. I think in that tail spin that was my mind, I convinced myself that if I held on long enough, that maybe it would just be a phase. I was wrong. I slipped away further into myself causing all kinds of new fractures to my being. Emotionally, I was allowing myself to be destroyed. To an extent, I am still there just in a lesser degree.
As months rolled by, I started to find myself a little more. I lost friends because they didn’t agree with the way I was handling things, but then times like these you find who your true friends really are. I also gained some amazing friends and repaired a friendship that had been lost to the ages. Funny how things work out. I started to think that I was pulling up. That I was slowly starting to regain myself or some sort of myself…I was wrong.
In thinking I had pulled myself back together, I complicated things with a very dear friend of mine. In fact I had adopted a thought process that I should always be honest with my feelings. I need to learn to control that and modify a bit, because its going to cost me some dear friends. Somethings are just too complex. Now, it’s such a sticky situation to even be able to talk to that friend… Wrapping my mind around fixing the problem. It’s like a clockwork box with millions of small gears. If ones spring pops… the whole thing falls apart.
In closing… I’m a broken being. I’m still all twisted up, but I’m trying to find a way to fix it. I think one thing that would help is if I return here. If I return myself to my work. Allow my madness to flow from my finger tips and on to this screen. I know I’ve lost some viewership. I hope I can earn you all back. Maybe even some new ones. I think I’ll start to chronicle some adventures of my own. Tell you the story of Malice. So my cheeky monkeys….I think this time I won’t make a grand re-entrance…I think I’ll just poor some tea and start to write
See You Soon, My Cheeky Monkeys,
Yet another bit of poetry…hope you are all enjoying this to a slight degree…
That is what this feels like
Gone without a trace
Obliterated from the mind
Why am I the only one holding on
Holding my past memories so dear
What was once something to calm the storm
Is now a black poison in my veins
Everyone else able to continue on
No one looks back and sees what I do
The memories are all but gone
Gone to all, but to me, not forgotten
Everyone sees us as separate now
Like two individuals
Instead of one being together
Or perhaps they are just being too polite
So why everyone else looks forward
I’ll be the one looking back
Fill the needle up with that tar black ink
I will remember—and We will never be forgotten
You know those favorite thingies that get passed around Facebook? Well let’s do one here huh? Who wants to know some truths about me? Everyone! Great! But how many….hm….50? Should I? Shit…too late I said it. It’s go time!
50 Shades of Malice Psychotik
- Favorite Color Combo? Purple and Black…as if you all couldn’t tell.
- Favorite clothing brand? Tripp NYC although I have found a thing or two I love from Red Ball and Dragonfly.
- Favorite type of music? Metal/Rock
- Favorite guilty pleasure type of music? 90’s Pop
- Favorite Disney Hero/Heroine? Jack Skellington/ Sally
- Favorite Disney Villain/Villain-es? Oogie Boogie/ Ursula
- Favorite Disney Princess? Elsa (Chick is Classy)
- Favorite Sci-fi Movie? Back to the Future
- Favorite Comedy Movie? Ted
- Favorite Drama Movie? Moulin Rouge
- Favorite Action Movie? The Matrix
- Favorite Dreamworks Movie? Shrek 2
- Favorite Video Game? Final Fantasy IX
- Favorite Game Console? PS3
- First Person Shooter or RPG? RPG (Most FPS are abysmal)
- Fighting Game or Racing Game? Fighting (I’m not one for going in circles)
- Sports Game or Party Game? Party Game (I tell you this is close…because either way you end up hating your friends)
- Favorite DC Comics Hero/Heroine? Batman/ (Can’t think of one female hero worth mentioning…)
- Favorite DC Villain/Villain-es? The Joker/ Harley Quinn
- Favorite Marvel Hero/ Heroine? Deadpool/ Rogue
- Favorite Marvel Villain/Villain-es? Green Goblin/ Phoenix
- Favorite X-men (Top 3)? Wolverine, Gambit, and Nightcrawler
- Favorite Band? Slipknot
- Favorite 70’s Band/Group? Kiss
- Favorite 80’s Band/Group? Def Leppard
- Favorite 90’s Band Group? I actually don’t think I have one….
- Favorite 00’s Band Group? Slipknot
- Favorite Pop Singer/Group? P!nk
- Favorite Pop One Hit Wonder? “Living La Vida Loca”
- Favorite Rapper? Eminem
- Favorite Soda? Baja Blast
- Favorite Adult Beverage? RUM!
- Favorite British Film? Shaun of the Dead
- Favorite Doctor Who Villain? Weeping Angels
- Favorite Car? 80’s Camero
- Favorite Mythical Creature? *Leans in close and whispers “Hail Hydra..”
- Favorite Monster? Vampires
- Favorite Cryptozoological creature? Big Foot
- Favorite Anime? Fullmetal Alchemist
- Favorite Manga? Hellsing
- Favorite Anime Character? Uchiha Itachi
- Favorite Animal? Tiger
- Favorite Book? “Long Hard Road out of Hell”
- Favorite Theme Park? Universal Orlando
- Favorite Theme Park Ride? The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman
- Favorite Classic Film? Dracula
- Favorite B-movie? Mr. Hush
- Favorite Cult Classic Movie? The Crow
- Favorite Director? Tim Burton
- Favorite Composer ? Hans Zimmer or Danny Elfman…its very close…
Here are a few smaller poems…just don’t see taking up a whole article for each….
Love to Despair
Soaring, Running, Leaping
Passion, Devotion—Destitute, Disengaged
Crying, Hurting, Falling
Stuck in the blizzard
Body gone numb from the cold
Froze still, No Way Out
There once was a boy from yonder
A relationship with a girl he did ponder
He asked for her hand
She left her man and–
Around Hell he now wanders
Hatred flows from my veins
A poisonous black
Causing my insides Pain
Makings my feelings lack
The worst for you I wish
You worthless piece of shit
Nothing but a silver fish
Leaving my life in the pit
You took from me life
A thief in the night
She was to be my wife
You knew it and did this in spite
For your sins you will pay
This is your destiny
Its coming your day
Karma is coming for My Enemy
Poetry was once a way I used to cleanse the soul. Well apparently I still have some cleaning to do. So for the next week or two expect poems and stories that aren’t to cheery….sort of doom and gloom…
I wish there were words
Words to Explain
The pain that I felt
When it all went away
The sorrow that crept in
The devastation that occurred
Like nothing I’ve ever felt
Like no pain I’ve endured
I’m so lost without you,
wading through a blinding snow
My life once had true purpose
Now I just don’t know
Never would have thought you gave me this
Such a perfect definition
But now that you are gone
I’m waiting to find my life’s direction
Which way do I go?
Do I back track or begin anew?
Keep moving at a slower pace
Like I’m neck-deep in glue
So lost without you
Cant face the storm
Can’t find a way out
Will this be my new norm?
Everyone tells me,
One day it will all make sense
That does me zero good now,
They aren’t stuck like this
Lost in a hopeless desert,
An endless sea,
A Fearsome White out
Is whats it’s like when you’re not with me.
So lost without you
I hope to regain my way
Do I charter a new course?
Or am I here to stay?
I know I was here before,
And something tells me I’ll live after
But when you chase a star and it burns
Now what do you go after?
I’m just so lost without you….
Well the time has come! They have revealed a first look at Ben Affleck in the Batman out fit. I know this is old news! Kiss my furry butt! I present exhibit A…
There that’s better! Doesn’t it look cool? This is a little more like it. I mean I don’t know what it is about the Batsuit….it just looks better. And it looks like for once Batman wont be in a tank…which is a plus. By the way if none of you have ever noticed I really am not a fan of Nolan Batman. Way too grounded. The only good thing that came from those films was a Decent Joker and a funny sounding Bane. That’s about it. I can only hope they will juice a little more fantasy back into my beloved Batman (I doubt it but we can dream right!)
So what are my thoughts on Batfleck? Well, it’s an unpopular one for sure. I think he will do a good job. I’ve seen worst. (Batman and Robin anyone?) Truthfully Ben is not a horrible actor. He is just one of those that is guilty of being in bad movies. I don’t think he was what ruined Daredevil. I actually like Daredevil. I think a lot of the cheese comes from their era it was made. This was wayyyyy before they really started taking Superhero movies the way they do today. It was no worst than a lot of the action films of the day. I personally blame Jennifer Garners Elektra. Sorry Ben, but your wife sucks. I could go on and on about how bad THAT movie was. Cut the playground fight scene and a few other scenes with Garner out and you have a decent enough movie.
Am I wrong? Time will tell Monkey’s! Until then, try to keep an open mind. If you don’t that’s OK too. That is what the internet is for Baby….
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
So I’m usually not one to post depressing news, but I need to post about this because I am pretty bummed. Apparently as of Yesterday, Joey Jordison is no longer with Slipknot. The band posted on their page Slipknot1.com that he would not longer be with the band. Personal reasons is all I’ve heard. But just…damn. Slipknot without Paul AND Joey? I don’t know…most of the songs were written by those two. Slipknot has just always been a large part of my life. It was going to be hard enough without Paul. But now Joey too? Is this the beginning of the end? I hope not!
By the way, I’ve also heard that there was another shooting in Colorado. A. What is up with teens in Colorado B. When are we going to do something to help stop this shit? Seriously….I’m going to go crawl under a rock….
I had something planned to post today, but I’ve been thinking a lot about things and have decided to give you all some heart-felt advice. To many times in life you are faced with decisions. Usually a choice has to be made between what will make you happy and what will make others happy. Some are simple…paying bills…going to work…etc. But some are very difficult because you end up weighing to many factors in. What will my friends think? What will my family think? Will society still accept me if I do this? So many different factors but never once factoring in the one thing that matters most…What do you want? It doesn’t matter what everyone else thinks. It doesn’t matter what your parents think. What matters is this…Is your choice going to harm anyone? Physically or Mentally? (And I don’t mean can they accept it, I mean does it REALLY harm them.) Is this going to hurt you? Does this make you happy? If your answer is No, No, Yes…congrats! You should know what you are going to do! Do what makes you happy…fuck the haters! Make yourself happy…because life is too short to worry about what others think.
Take this to your hearts Darlings! I will be back tomorrow with some more Madness!
Until Next Time, My Freaky Darlings,