Oh my, how time flies when you stick yourself in a deep pit of despair. Then instead of finding the way out, you find that you just stuck yourself on a damn hamster wheel! Hello my cheeky monkeys! I’ve missed you all! What brings me back you may ask? After all of the false starts and dud take offs, what made me dust off the key board? If chaos, possible world ending events, a pandemic, civil unrest, and multiverse level threats cant do it… What can? or Who can?! How about an old friend? David Lee Madison ((Mr. Hush, Middle Village)) has released a new movie, Wit’s End. I had been lurking in the shadows while he developed this. So when he asked me to get a peek at it, how could I refuse? It was an honor. Lets get into the review shall we?
Psychotik Review: Wit’s End
Let’s start with the plot synapses: Jeffrey Stevens ((David Lee Madison)) is an amazing father, husband, and friend. Life throws him a left hook when he must battle a unexpected blizzard. Stranded in the woods with no service and just his wits, will he make it home to his loved ones or will this be his Wit’s End… See what I did there? That is the story! Very simple, great story telling. Honestly, I found something very warm and fuzzy in this film. Its not a big Hollywood blockbuster, but it offers something warm to the soul.
The movie sets up establishing Jeff’s character. You have a few warm moments with him and his daughter Jessica ((played by Amanda Madison)). Then you move on to some pretty funny back and forth banter between him and his brother and their best friend, Tom Stevens ((Brian O’Halloran)) and Steve ((Scott Sciaffo)). Pay attention and you may even find an Easter Egg for another set of movies we all love ((Tee Hee)). The chemistry in these scenes are nice refreshing slice of life type stuff, that you can only real life bonds. Warm and fuzzy! The movie progresses with Jeff going out to his family cabin to get some gifts he has stashed away for Valentines while his wife and child are away. Simple errand with the possibility of some free time right? Well mother nature has a way of putting a wrench in your plans. Or in Jeff’s case, a tire iron to the knee and a whole lot of ice! I would love to go further but I really don’t want to ruin anything.
Wit’s End is a slice of life movie we need. David Madison delivers with a step outside of the conventional summer blockbuster and big budget film to tell a tale worth telling. How far will a person go for his loved ones? What type of adversity could they face when it seems like the world has turned on them? In a world with so much pain and uncertainty, this is a warm tale we need. A tale of love that’s just good for the soul. It made me think: What would I do to get back to my kids? How far would I go?
So overall, what do I rate it? How any Top Hats? I think I’m going to drop the rating portion of these reviews. I’ve grown to not really like that style of review. I’m not a fan of metacritic sites. People get to dialed into quantifying movies by numbers. I don’t want to be a part of that wheel anymore. Just go see it! It’s a great movie. Its streaming on demand now. I know Amazon has it. So buy or rent it today, and enjoy some food for the heart and soul!
That’s all for now my cheeky monkeys! It wont be long between these articles. I think its time for me to come back. Like really time ya know?
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
I look on at this dusty console. Its been so long. So long since ive churned out anything for the masses. I’ve been… selfish. A little negligent. But I’ve had my reasons. I suppose I thought, maybe you all didn’t need me. That i needed to just let life move on and fade into obscurity like ive done in the lives of so many close to me. Why not? I couldn’t really find a good reason. The last few years taken its toll. What if you cheeky monkeys didnt need me? Then the itch happens a few months back.
I’ve been watching this whole time. Watching as the world begins to rip apart in the most awful of ways. Not in fun lighthearted madness, laughing into the night, but with greed and malevolence. Not right. It doesn’t sit well with me. So i walk across my MORTIS to my ancient desk that sit unused in the corner. Sit down, and let the words flow from my finger tips once again. Its been too long.
So as this year comes to an end, I leave you with these thoughts:
This last year has not been an easy one. Hell the last couple years have not been easy! its time to take a stand. Its time to decide we are all going to move forward, fight, and make this better. Anyway you can make it better, do it! It’s hard to think positive when the whole world is falling apart ((figuratively and literally in some cases)) You can’t save the whole world though. You just cant. But you can inject a little bit of positive energy when you can.
Dont forget to live life. Don’t forget to love freely. Its hard sometimes. The world beats you down and tells you not to. Tells you not to trust. Tells you you’re lazy if you try enjoying it. But your lives are so short and so fragile to sit by and let the little things eat at you. Every being in the multiverse is a book, and each day your write a new part. A new paragraph. Sometimes a chapter. Make it a good read. Go out and be amazing.
Now what am I going to do this year? 2019… I’m back. I’m going to drag myself to this keyboard and keep grinding away until I’m back to where I was. Why? Well… one part I want to, and another part I think its needed. Maybe one more voice. One more view-point. One more madman running his mouth isn’t a bad thing. If it can benefit even one person, it will be worth it.
Go out tonight and enjoy the end of this hard year. Pour a drink and ask “What the fuck happened?” Then tomorrow, lets roll up them sleeves and find a new way to make 2019…at minimum… better than last year. Lets move forward, and as wise men once said, Be excellent to each other!
Sadistically… and Humbly Yours,
Hmm, so it appears that today’s audience likes pain. Well, my cheeky monkeys, i have lots of that! Do you all want to hear a tale? Good! Pull up a seat and pour a drink. This is from a dimension I’m sure a lot of you are familiar with. This one is called…
The Haunter and the Umbreon
A time ago there was a playful Haunter and feisty Umbreon that crossed paths. The built a glorious friendship. Slow at first but then it grew and grew. Secretly they both were quite fond of one another. More so than just friends. However for a time they kept it to themselves. As it happens in most matters of the heart though, it did blossom into a beautiful love affair. So happy the two were.
They were the talk of the wild. Other Pokemon were jealous of what the two had. So much so that they tried to cause problems pretty regularly for the two. For a time though, as bad as things got, they still had each other. They had some of the most amazing adventures. All over, to places you wouldn’t imagine. It was a special thing what the two creatures had. He would always haunt her mind, and she would light his darkness. But that’s not to say it was perfect all the time.
You see both Pokemon had dark pasts. Abusive trainers, bullied by other Pokemon, lied too, and broken. This weighed against things too. Haunter tried to hide his pain through jokes and laughs. Umbreon would get battered down and retract. These types of matters you either rise up and fix it or things fall to pieces. Fall they did…
One day it all became too much. At first it was Haunter that pulled away. In the back of his head he was afraid to go all in. To lend his heart out to another got to much. Umbreon’s life also grew to a fever pitch. The two fell to pieces. To tell the details is far too heartbreaking. Either way it ends in the burn cinders on a beautiful love, burned up before its time. They both went their separate ways. Haunter tried to cut his own path, and Umbreon found another.
All was not right with the Haunter though. He tried to make it look like he was. He may have even believed it. But soon he realized the truth… He lost a very good thing, and it hurts. Now they only thing to light his darkness is a little candle. A little candle that doesn’t light much and he can’t see very far. But it has to do. He used to haunt her, now she would haunt him.
The moral of the story my sweeties, we all have ups and downs and we all go through different things at different times. Sometimes you have to weather a lot, sometimes a little. I’m not saying to keep yourself in a bad, dangerous position. Being beaten or manipulated is no good for anyone involved But if it’s just stress and hard times, you fight for the one you loved. Hard times have a way of clouding the good times. You have to hold onto the good times. You just have to. It’s easy to let go at first, but you will feel the price of that later. Just Try. Romance and love are like fire. Fire burns sometime. You just got to hold onto those worth burning for.
A lot of people have been asking why I haven’t made a full return to the site yet. Well sometimes things are a little easier said than done. You see when I sit down to write i need quite, no distractions. But, the less distractions i have the more I’m able to think. The more rogue thoughts, that otherwise i would have kept buried are able to come to the surface. All the sudden it’s not so quiet anymore. My life can sometimes be complicated by my own mind. The same mind that allows me to put myself apart from others and flow my creative juices can be a horrible nemesis. It’s the nature of the beast. Allow me to set the stage for you…
Its late night. Little bit is asleep. I have an idea burning at the back of my head. A wonderful story to share with the Verse. I pour a drink, sit in my favorite chair, open up the MORTIS console and begin to write. Then a few lines in, its starts. At first as an indistinct chitter or a static. Then louder. The room grows dark and I’m no longer in my room, I’m in my head. Sitting at my desk surrounded by a plain white light from above. Then he steps into frame, or rather… I step into frame. Another version of me. He saunters over to the table and leans into it to talk to me.
Malice 2: Hey there me! What you writing? Finally decide to sit down and write that story? Well you had to do it sometime, you have so many up there in that noggin. Its going to be really hard to catch people up on what you’ve been doing! But you know that.
Me: Well yeah. I mean I have to start somewhere and I’m actually feeling better about things and at peace. Now is a good time to..
Malice 2: But how long will it last?
Me: I don’t know, but I have to try. I mean maybe if I get started it will keep me going.
Malice 2: Youve done this a lot though. What makes this time anymore special. It’s not like a whole lot of right is going on right now. Sure you won’t just flake?
Me: Well I don’t know if I don’t…
Malice 3: I’ve heard this all before. Just because you are ok now, doesn’t mean you are ok. It’s just the moment. Maybe work on something else and make it last a little longer.
Malice 4: He can’t make things last! Have you been paying attention? All attempts to find a life long companion end in tragedy! Everything we do ends and ruin! If he could have fixed himself, he would have a long time ago. It’s a lost cause!
Malice 5: It’s all the truth. Just give up. You can’t do it anyway. People will hate it. You are wasting your time!
Malice 6: It’s your faut she left! Its your fault she’s gone! You screwed it up!
Malice 2: Well now lets not be too harsh. We can’t blame him for every—
Malice 7: BLAME HIM FOR IT ALL HE DESERVES IT!! FEEL THAT PAIN! LET IT BURN! LET IT SCAR!!!
The room erupts into more negative thoughts as their voices fill the room, all I can discern is anger from the others mes. It’s a roar. A Deafening roar. Then I hear my companions, my travel buddies way in the back. Faintly. “Boss?” “Malice..” “Don’t listen” “Get out of there.” “It’s not true.” But it’s so faint, I can barely hear it before it’s just drowned out. The noise hits a fever pitch. I’m about to start thrashing about. Then a soft voice rises to the top. I close my eyes to try to focus.
The room is empty. I blink my eyes and im back in my room. Jazzy is standing next to me. She wraps her arms around me…
Jazzy: Daddy your sad. Please come to bed. I’m tired.
I smile at her and hug her close. I close the console and lay down next to her hugging her as she drifts off. This is my mind… My demons… My own worst enemy…
See you soon,
Wow! it has been a really long time since I booted up the console to write for you all. Is there anyone still out there? No? Yes? Maybe? Well, which ever it may be I want to share a story with you all. It is Christmas after all. And while I don’t have much to give you all, I can give you the gift of a story. A Good story is sometimes better than gold to some. Keeping with the theme of Christmas I’ll tell you a Christmas tale.
Some of you may wonder, What does a Vonderlanian do for Christmas? Well, there was a time (Back when everyone was alive) that we had some rather magnificent holiday celebrations. Actually, they were a lot like the Christmas celebrations that you are celebrating today (in multiple time lines and endless dimensions across the verse). We even had a sort of Santa type character. Well he was more an old Elder God, but that is neither here nor there. So the real question is what do I do on Christmas? Easy! Jazmin and myself stay in the MORTIS on the interdimensional lay line. Why you may ask? Well because I am relentlessly stalked through some dimensions because of something I did a long time ago.This is my tale…
Malice and The Naughty List
A long time ago, before Jazmin was born, and I was a lot more fast and loose with my science (Not that I got any better, I was just worse) I was working on a really groovy animate formulae. I was on the verge of creating a formlulae that could animate anything with zero negative impacts. So close in fact that, I decided to take a break. It was Christmas eve and I had been working very hard. What better way to treat yourself then have some ginger bread cookies and egg nog? I couldn’t think of one! Well, I should have considered that I was working with some pretty dangerous stuff. If I would have maybe I would have tried drinking some non alcoholic egg nog (I do love me some egg nog and bourbon!)
I’m not sure when my break turned into a party, but it did. I mean… Not a huge party! About thirty people… Uh Anyway! Somehow in the scuffle I spilled a beaker of my formulae onto the gingerbread men. This went unchecked for quite sometime. Apparently long enough for the ginger bread men to animate and leave my laboratory. Also, enough time for them to attack a small homeless camp of maybe 100 homeless people (not small at all). This is where things got very weird…
I woke up in an empty lab. It looked wrecked. Like, the party may have gotten a little out of hand. That happens a lot, but I didn’t think anything of it. Smelled a lot like cookies. I ignored it because hey, better than how the lab smelled sometimes. I just thought it was strange no one decided to wake me up. I got a soda from the fridge and turned the TV on while i looked for some stuff for a sandwich. It was at that time I noticed something strange. Looked like there was some rioting going on in the city. Me being a curious little caat, I turned up the volume. It looked as if Gingerbread men were attacking everyone. I laughed thinking that this was a big holiday joke. That was until I put my hand on a tray that had some broken remains of a beaker and some cookie crumbs. Oops!
Away like a shot I poofed (Vaporated)! When I got there I couldn’t believe my eyes! It looked like something out of a zombie movie, but with cookies. The police were barricaded behind cars and sand bags trying to fight off a large hoard of gingerbread men (And I’ll guess women. Why not? I mean carnage isn’t sexist!) That wasn’t even the worst part though. What came next haunted me for about 30 seconds. One of the officers was trying to sneak around the hoard to get behind the barricade. Well a few noticed him and ran to grab him. The officer had just about made it through when one of the cookie men latched onto his leg with sharp peppermint teeth. He got through the barricade before it took out a chunk. I decided to poof behind the barricade to see what was going on . Maybe ask a few questions. There was a Sargent standing next to where I appeared. He was kind of slack-jawed and amazed, but I got him to snap to it and give me a run down of what was going on. While he was telling me, my eyes were drawn to the bit officer. He was screaming and convulsing.
It happened so quick. Another officer yelled he had been bit. Before anyone could react, the officers body twisted and shred away. He turned into a gingerbread man! Which then started attacking other officers…and they followed suit. I grabbed the Sargent and poofed to a nearby roof top. He was a little angry at first, until he realized there were no more of his “men” to protect. He told me how it started with the group of them from the homeless camp and how their numbers just grew and swelled as they worked through the city. No one really knew what to do. On bite and you became one of them. I began thinking of ways I could undo this. Really I couldn’t save anyone that had been turned. I just needed to figure out a way to stop it.
Apparently, I was deep in thought because I didn’t notice the Sargent turn until he lunged at me. I poofed out of the way, and that was probably good because his head exploded. It was then I saw the jolly shape of Old Saint Nick. Standing there with a smoking candy cane gun in hand. I went to say Hi, but he looked a little less than impressed with me. Some elves rolled out of his sleigh and took positions all over the roof top. He boomed at me. Some such shit about how irresponsible i was….blah blah blah… stupid curious cat…blah blah blah…you need to fix this. I explained I was thinking about a way to fix it when that last one attacked me. I heard shots around the edge of the building. The Gingerbread Men had decided to focus on us.
I’m not sure whether they just didn’t have enough ammo to match the numbers or they were just bad shots. But it wasn’t long until the elves were Gingerbread men too. Santa made it just in time to take off. I zipped up to him. That didn’t last long. He pushed me out of the sleigh. Good thing I can levitate. From up there I could see the situation was way out of control on the ground. On the bright side, everything smelled wonderful! I had to figure out how to take out all of these cookie monsters (Ha Ha!) If only I had some egg nog to help me…. THATS IT!!! I got on the phone to Minion and told him to get the high pressure hydro cannon. While he did that, I ran around like a Mad Cat getting all of the Egg Nog I could find.I loaded it all into the fluid chamber and then let the fun start.
I made my stand right before they made it to a big orphanage. Wave after wave came at me, and I blasted them to mush. Ate a few of them too. Man they were good. Almost sort of justice being served. Towards the end of the battle, it became a Maelstrom of ginger cookies and egg nog. I may have gotten a little carried away, because I flooded the orphanage. A many of child got completely trashed that night, but they were saved! All of them were put down, and the city was safe. Santa landed on the street behind me. Seemed like he was pretty happy… Until he smelled the bourbon…and saw the drunk kids. He then told me my name was going at the top of the Naughty List and was never coming off. I didn’t think it was a big deal, until I realized the naughty list transcends dimensions and I was on them all. So now I spend Christmas in the lay line, where they can’t find me.
Hope you all enjoyed the tale. A little rusty, but hey… got to knock it off somehow. Have a Merry Christmas you all, and here’s to a New Year!
The world has changed.
Its been a long time and a few false starts. I’ve been away from this for far too long. I look around at the world around me, and I have to say: I’m not impressed. In fact, in some cases I’m down right pissed. People all over the planet at each others throat. An election coming up that has spiraled way out of control. Sum it up, hatred is at an all time high. The only way I see to fix it, is to put forth some positive energy into the world. That is indeed what this world needs, positive energy. It needs a lot of it too.
In truth, I’ve had the itch to come back for some time now. I didn’t know if I could though. I kept thinking i was ready but I would sit down at the console, and nothing. Or an excuse. Id thing of something else that i could do. Trick myself that their was something I needed to do. I can’t do that anymore. I started this site with a few things in mind. They are as follows:
- Spread my madness throughout the world. A message that needed to be heard. Spread stories that needed to be told
- Do something to leave a mark. Give my own little one something to look at and shoot for.
- To make an impact on this world, even if it’s a small one. Everything little thing matters to someone
Three things that needed to be that I turned my back Encyclopedia Psychotika? Answers simple, a broken heart. Losing my Seras was a blow I wasn’t prepared to take. It took a lot to recover from that. A lot of soul-searching. A lot of… everything. A Chehsire Cats mind is not an easy thing to repair. Nor is the heart. I still miss her. I’ll always miss her. She was a large chunk of my life. At the end of the day though, she gave me the best gift in the world. My little toon Jazmin has helped to fill the void and ground her dad when needed.
Now that I’m back though… I have a problem. Where do I start? Pick up where I left off? Treat you all to some stories? I guess we will just have to sit down and see what comes out. We will just see where… or when…. we will end up. See you real soon….
I know i said this was coming yesterday, funny thing about life: It always has an interesting way of taaking you in another direction. Not that this is a horrible thing. Sometimes, it takes you in the direction you need instead of the one you want…
ANY HOW!!! MOVING ON!!!
Lets put this baby in to gear and take it there. Input some corridinates. Play with the navigation a bit. I do love the sound the controls make to go to Halloween Horror Nights. You all don’t know about that yet though…Hmmm…Story for another time perhaps? Yes! Anyway, pulll this lever and… We’re off! While we are heading there I have a few words to add. Ive not actually visited this year yet. The opening night was last night. I’ve already heard some good things. This is really just a sit down and see whats in store. I know a lot of you creepy little monkeys already know, but hey there are some that may still not. So far, we are planning to go the 8th of October in this year of 2015. I like how I worded that! HA HA! Also yess, I do realize i still owe you a review for last year. So this year you get a twofer!! Doesn’t make up for it huh? I’m sorry guys just bare **MORTIS crashes down** with me. We’re here!
Let’s open the door and see if we can have a peek. Where are we–
**Door creaks open to see a very angry fire haired clown looking at his now crushed desk**
Crypt with purple lights!? Only one person I know that drives a crypt with purple lanterns… MALICE!!! Get your Top Hatted ass out here! What did I tell you the last time you dropped in!? Call first!
Jack “The Clown” Schmidt everyone! Jack I apologized for that. Besides, you still have Eddie as a Chainsaw weilding maniac! Did you really need the one with the stitched face?
Yeah I know I have Eddie, but do you know what its like dealing with that prick Michael Bay? Almost as bad as watching his Nightmare on Elm Street! I shudder just thinking about it!
What if I promise to get you a new desk hmm? I’m sure I have something. Why don’t you show me around a bit and I’ll have Minion go look for one and set it up? Good?
Alright deal! But it better have some tricks to it. I liked that damn desk! Chance!!! Come on babes, let’s show Malice around!
**I peek in the door to the MORTIS** MINION!!! Get a desk out of one of the old office rooms and set it up for Jack while I’m gone!
Is that an order Bosss. I thought last night at the party we agreed you were downgraded to miniion?
Do you really want to have this discussion now?
You got a point Bosss, right away!
**Chance comes bouncing in the door**
Sure thing! **Stops wide eyed and plays with the dirt with her foot before looking down** Hi Malice…
Hi there Chance…
Do you really want to cross this bridge with me right now?
Yeah your right, let’s get this thing on the road! What we got for this year my grease painted fiend!
As you may know this is the 25th anniversary of Halloween Horror Nights. So who better to help celebrate than yours truely? So to help celebrate I brought some of the best hits from the last 25 years to life in a side show that people won’t soon forget. I even put a twist on a few classics. Last night went well, but as you know it’s not really a show until the body count beats last year! And boy are we hoping to set the bar high. So.. without anymore adue… WELCOME TO THE SHOW!
This year the event boasts nine houses to keep you screaming in terror. Five Screamzones over run with the best kind of maniacs you can dig up. Two shows to make you laugh and make you yell “Hell Yeah!” to the top of your lungs. And finally as a bonus, Universal has graciously let some of their more popular rides stay open, to flesh it all out. The houses look like this:
The Walking Dead: The Living and The Dead: Travel through a maze where the living can be just as dangerous as the Dead. Back by popular demand, Take a trip through the 5th seasons of AMC’s The Walking Dead. Don’t get bit…
Freddy vs. Jason: Ladies and Gentlemen, I remember how much you loved the New Lines Monsters in 07′, So I’ve brought them back again…and in a big way. Two Horror Icons, one house! I’m going to let them duke it out and you get a front row seat. Remember, Whoever wins, you still lose!
Insidious: This trick took some planning. Prepare to take a trip through the Further. A place where everyone is dead and they all want one thing…YOU! Watch your back. As Beetlejuice says, Possession is 9/10ths of the law!
The Purge: Welcome to a world that is my kind of place! They activated The Purge in the streets last year, this year I’m going to make it a little more personal. Will you survive the night? Or just become another Victim?
An American Werewolf in London: This is a transformation you won’t want to miss. And no it’s not Bruce Jenner! One of the most popular house in Halloween Horror Nights history is back! Come face to face as this horror movie classic howls back to life.
Jack Presents: 25 Years of Monsters and Mayhem: For this attraction, I took a look through the back list of the last 25 years. This is a maze made out of the worst of the worst. The cream of the chop! If you are a Horror Nights fan, all your friends are here. I know you’re just dying to see them…. or rather… you will be.
RUN: Blood, Sweat, and Fears: You know I can’t do a show without Eddie having some input. One of your favorites returns for a third installment. This time the maniacs of RUN are dressed up as a TV show. Makes you really wonder about that new show “Hellevator” huh?
Asylum In Wonderland 3D: Well this made an amazing Scarezone in the past. And everyone loved the cameo in Scary Tales. So I figured… Why not make it larger than life. This isnt the Wonderland you know…
Body Collectors- Recollections: I wonder what will happen when you release the Body Collectors on the Maniacs of Shady Brook Asylum…. Lets find out shall we. What could those collectors possibly be doing with these pieces?
Psychoscarapy – Unleashed: With the Collectors loose in their Asylum, the more aggressive ones hit the street. That place really needs some better security. What do you think?
HHN – Icons: Looks like the gangs all here! Can’t have a birthday bash without some old friends. Its okay kids…they won’t hurt you….Much!
Scary Tales – Screampunk: Your favorite fairytale twisted up with a dash of Saws N Steam… What can possibly go wrong? Well they could turn into blood thirsty maniacs… but that wont hurt me one bit!
Evil’s Roots: Sometimes you just haave to go back to your roots… And that’s what we have done. HHN has grown some pretty horrible monsters in the past, and thats just what I’ve done for you here…. Only I planted them in Central Park! Ha Ha Ha!
All Nite Die-In – Double Feature: You loved it as a house, now its a Scarezone! Whats better than a Drive Thru? How about a Drive Thru that brings movies to life… Horror Movies that is!
Bill and Ted’s Excellent Halloween Adventure: Your favorite time traveling duo is back and no pop culture icon is safe! If you have seen it on your Facebook, chances are you’ll see it here. Bring your sense of humor!
The Carnage Returns: You loved my show back in 07′, What kind of host would I be if it didn’t come back! And bigger than ever! Don’t miss the greatest show unearthed…Staring me!!!
Transformers: The Ride 3D: Help the Autobots fight against the Decepticons. Don’t let them get whats left of the All Spark! Personally I’m pulling for the Deciepticons.
Hollywood Rip Ride, Rock-It: Get ready to ride the music! Pick a tune, and then hold on tight! Good luck hearing your song over the sound of all the screams!
Revenge of the Mummy: Saddle up on this run away coaster as the mummy tries to claim your soul. Either I get you or him. Take your pick.
Men in Black Alien Attack: A;liens have crashed in New York and you have been deputized catch them all and bring them back in. If you bring some to me, theirs some green in it for ya!
Simpsons The Ride: Side Show Bob is on the loose and he has set his sights on, surprise, The Simpsons. Some people never learn!
Harry Potter and the Escape from Gringott’s: Can you survive a trip down to the depths of one of the most heavily guarded banks of the Wizarding world?
So, what do you think Malice? Sound like one hell of a show?
Jack I always trust a show you are part of. Why would I have a reason not to? Horror Nights royalty right here. I can’t wait to experience the whole thing in the flesh. Well I hear the sirens blowing up and calling your name. Better get to it. You got a busy night ahead.
That is true. Let me walk you back to the tent.
Any chance i can ask you for one last favor?
Anything for an old friend….
**We talked as we walked back to his office tent**
Well Minion, its time to go back. Before we go though, There is a matter that needs to be discussed.
Oh yeah? Whats that boss?
Well the other night you had some pretty harsh words for me. And well, I just wanted to tell you I’ve thought long and hard on them. I appreciate your honesty and well. I want to reward you with a sneak peek at one of Jack’s secret attractions.
Really Boss? Damn that’s awesome! I thought you would have been mad…
Me Mad!? Noooooo! That’s not me. You see it’s right over here in this cage. You just stand… right there yes, and pull that rope to undo the curtain.
OK here goes! Wonder whats inside...
**Minion pulls the rope. The floor drops out and he falls down a shoot into a dark hole**
Uh Boss I think I pulled the wrong one..
Oh no Minion, you pulled the right one.
You are actually really mad aren’t you?
Furious actually! **said with a smile** IF YOU EVER CALL ME A MINION AGAIN!!! Well, I just hope you remember this…
What the hell is down… OH GOD! Somethings moving…What do you got down here?
**Toss down a light** Here use this.
Nice of you! What do we got dow…. Oh NO! Oh MAN! THATS A LOT OF TEETH
**Maniacs scream, Zombies Moan, and wolves howl down in the hole as a little light runs around the room** Have fun Minion!
How long you leaving him down there?
Oh I’ll be back after this weekend. He’ll be fine. Just throw him some of the garbage from clean up. Have fun!
**Walking inside the MORTIS I turn some knobs and throw a few switches**
Hmm, I wonder where we go to go next. Maybe I’ll think on it…Was I being too hard on Minion? Leave a message in the comments with what you think!
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
I sit in the MORTIS. Looking around as the dust settles. It has been a busy year…. Had it been a year? No longer than a year! Traveling does such things to the mind. Times, Space, Dimension jumping can scatter the most skilled mind. Let alone one as long scattered as mine. The life of a Cheshire Cat is often not an easy one. I’ve been sitting here for while looking at the wreckage. The consoles all ash marked. The controls taken apart. Everything half-fixed. It’s time to breathe some life back into this old thing. Maybe fixing the ship will help fix the pilot.
I have such stories to tell you all. Such adventures. Hell, Halloween Horror Nights 25 starts tomorrow and I owe you a review from last year still. So many movies have went untalked about. Such current events not discussed. I’ll just say those are probably best not talked about. It appears as if this world has completely lost its mind. I suppose my madness is not the only brand out there. Some people should really watch what brand of madness they subscribe to. After all, some people are out just to watch this world and its time line burn. Normally this wouldn’t be an issue, but me and the little bit just so happen to call this plane home. Can’t allow it to go to complete shit now can we. She’s a little too fond of this dimension.
I get up from many chair. It’s so dark in here. Lets take a look outside. Opening the door i look down at the Earth. So peaceful from way up here floating in orbit. Scanning the land, I have to say I don’t like what I see in a good portion of it. I’m done with the negative. The negative side of life has choked me out for far too long. I stretch my arms and crack my neck. As my neck makes a loud pop, my hat falls. Man is it dusty. I slap the dust off and place it on my crown. My eyes widen as I run inside. A grand idea crosses my mind. I’ll throw this switch, and turn these knobs! Pull down these levers and turn on the these breakers. The computer console whines to life. Hmm, yes! These commands. Lets change the look of this ol girl. Lets make things look new…NO! Classic. Yes, classic Victorian…But with a bit of pirate. Like my old ship! And with just a dash of steam!
The room lights up as everything goes blurry and fades away. The old, burnt, broken, and busted gives way to beautiful wood and brass work. everything lit up with warm glow. And the gears! Gears! Beautiful Brass Gears! Time to set a coarse…But where too? Maybe we will visit Jack. Jack and his wonderful Carnival of Carnage. Full Report on whats going on with Halloween Horror Nights tomorrow…. I’m back my Cheeky Monkeys! I’m back and its time to switch this life into full overload.
As most of you know, my 2014 was a rough year. A relationship of years dissolved right before my eyes. It was crushing. I had held onto it for so long. In hind sight there were a lot of signs I should have just let it go. Just let it end. Maybe if I would have it wouldn’t have been so hard. I guess the small optimistic side of me just took hold too hard. That started a bad downward spiral for me. One that I kept the magnitude to myself.
I endured a lot over those next couple months. Watching my once fiance with another man wasn’t easy. It was all right in front of my eyes and in the closest of fashion. That was my mistake. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to be subjected to that. I think in that tail spin that was my mind, I convinced myself that if I held on long enough, that maybe it would just be a phase. I was wrong. I slipped away further into myself causing all kinds of new fractures to my being. Emotionally, I was allowing myself to be destroyed. To an extent, I am still there just in a lesser degree.
As months rolled by, I started to find myself a little more. I lost friends because they didn’t agree with the way I was handling things, but then times like these you find who your true friends really are. I also gained some amazing friends and repaired a friendship that had been lost to the ages. Funny how things work out. I started to think that I was pulling up. That I was slowly starting to regain myself or some sort of myself…I was wrong.
In thinking I had pulled myself back together, I complicated things with a very dear friend of mine. In fact I had adopted a thought process that I should always be honest with my feelings. I need to learn to control that and modify a bit, because its going to cost me some dear friends. Somethings are just too complex. Now, it’s such a sticky situation to even be able to talk to that friend… Wrapping my mind around fixing the problem. It’s like a clockwork box with millions of small gears. If ones spring pops… the whole thing falls apart.
In closing… I’m a broken being. I’m still all twisted up, but I’m trying to find a way to fix it. I think one thing that would help is if I return here. If I return myself to my work. Allow my madness to flow from my finger tips and on to this screen. I know I’ve lost some viewership. I hope I can earn you all back. Maybe even some new ones. I think I’ll start to chronicle some adventures of my own. Tell you the story of Malice. So my cheeky monkeys….I think this time I won’t make a grand re-entrance…I think I’ll just poor some tea and start to write
See You Soon, My Cheeky Monkeys,
I’m going to throw this out there, I don’t want to write this article. I don’t want to talk about this anymore. But before i can move on…I feel I have to put this feeling to rest. Lets talk about the recent news highlight reel of police brutality. Let’s talk about Ferguson. Let’s talk about Eric Garner. I know there are more, but these are the ones I’m going to focus on. Let me start out with saying, I’m not on the side police, I’m not on the side of the idiots rioting, I’m on the side of the people who want to have true justice. The ones that really see the problem, and want to fix it. Lets Organize this a bit.
I didn’t title this section Law Enforcement because I don’t see a lot of LAW enforcement going on. I know that there are good cops out there. So when reading this, if you are law enforcement, and you know you are a good cop that busts his ass and keeps his nose clean, know I’m not throwing you under the bus. I’m talking about the people who are failing. Yes, I know Mike Brown was caught on tape robbing a store. He was breaking the law. But since when do we deserve to die for stealing. They do have evidence that says he fought with Darren Wilson. But why is no one highlighting these facts. Why did he let him get that close to his car? That is where I go to…Police policy needs a reform. We are in the 21st century. Unarmed people should not be dying in the street. There needs to be a better system in place. Even if it would be an institution of a policy where you can shoot to disable vs, shoot to kill. Something needs to happen. The human race needs to move forward.
And that is just a small part of it. If you want to poke holes in The Wilson v. Brown, fine….lets talk about Eric Garner. Here we have a case that should be cut and dry. An Officer broke the law. He used a hold that is banned. Its banned for a reason. And it was caught on camera. This brings up a sick issue in this country of “Who watches the Watchmen.” This country needs to send a message that there is police accountability. We are all held accountable at our jobs. If I fuck up, I get fired. Same….damn….thing. You don’t get a do over because your job is hard.
How could all of this been fixed, smoothed over, etc… A lot of ways that all aren’t important now because people are dead. The news is blowing up with these incidents. Could be we are paying more attention, could not be! What ever the reason its showing a clear pattern of…we need a change. We need to grow as a society. Whether it be better equipment, or totally reforming the rules of engagement….we need to grow because people are dying. They aren’t even making it to the court system. This is not a Judge Dredd type reality. They are not Judges…
Dropping the Ball
Hi Rioters! Yes I’m looking at you fleshy sacks of meat. No easy way to say this…you are idiots. Morons. You are hurting your cause. I don’t even think you have a cause. I don believe you really care about anything. You ignorant asses are burning down where you live. Hurting businesses that have nothing to do with anything. I don’t want to hear anything about we’ve had enough…yeah a lot of people have had enough. They chose to protest in a peaceful way and not like animals. You failed.
The police failed you and you followed suit. I know people have been through peaceful protests for years, but you know what…they worked. It’s a slow process, but it works. Don’t like it? Use that squishy piece of grey matter in your dense skull and find another way. You can’t right a wrong by causing more wrong. If the cops are going to get away with killing an unarmed man who was stealing cigarillos, what do you think will happen to you in a riot? THINK PEOPLE!!
And a final word to those of you saying it’s because we are on the verge of revolution. No we aren’t. Countries that have had revolutions, their government kills tens of thousands a year. Freedom is completely repressed by the lead of a bullet. You haven’t even begun to figure out what you want. You just know that you don’t like the way you are being treated. Find a leader in this. Form a party so that you can flesh out how the government is ran. The country is at a point of change…but you have to try to change it first. To say you are ready for revolution means you are ready for Civil War. Killing your family and friends….for your ideals…I don’t think you are ready for that. There is also the looming idea that we have a lot of enemies. Who is to say you take down big brother…and you don’t end up with Russia or China or anyone else attacking? Again….think.
The Real Problem
The real problem here is we are at the edge. We are at a turning point because people are waking up. Information is more available and information is power. We have to change. The flow of information is no longer controlled like it was before. The Police system needs to change. The ways that we think need to change. It’s a problem all around. All life matters, and the sooner that people realize that, the better it will be. I can’t even believe this type of rant is coming from me. Maybe more like me need to speak up for sure. People that look at the big picture. You need to look at your real enemy.
Your real enemy is your voice being heard. You are being ran in circles with panic. You are being turned on one another by the media. Who owns that? Your 1% is the real enemy. Beat them. Unite together. Quit listening to the people with private agendas and look at the big picture. Life matters. We need to fix it. Your country is not broken. You can fix it…together. Unite as a human race and fix this shit.
Now this is the last I’m going to harp on it. I’ve just had so many people asking me my opinion on it, and needed it off my chest. Bad thing is…I could go on forever about this. Fact of the matter is, things need to change. But you need to think of more intelligent ways to change it then what you have. You can do it…but the choice is yours. Rise together….or fall apart.
From the idea of KFC’s very own famous bowl…inspired by Patton Oswald’s famous rant…I bring you a Failure Pile in a Sadness Bowl. This is a meal for the person that says ” Fuck it! I’m eating like an animal today!” How do you make FP in a SB? Well one way is go to KFC. I make mine a bit different.
Okay, none of this is gourmet/home made. I feel it would have taken away from the “Fuck this!” feeling. You use Idahoan Applewood Smoked Bacon mashed potatoes, topped with sweet corn with garlic powder/onion powder/pepper, top that with some Great Value Chicken Wyngz, and then smothered with Great Value Brown Gravy, and Three Cheese Cheddar. Put all of that in a sadness bowl and your ready to eat. Enjoy!
*Shaking his Ass* SHAKE SHAKE SENORA!! OH SHIT!!! Sometimes vaporation is a good easy way to transport one somewhere. But I’ll be honest, its when you do it instinctively that it gets annoying! Just enjoying a morning romp. Anyway where was I…well I was dancing! *Shakes maracas* Well this is rubbish! Toss these aside *cat yowl* Ohh, Sorry!
HELLO MY CHEEKY MONKEYS!! I’ve missed you all something fierce you have no idea. Again I’ve been away dealing with personal nonsense. I do believe this time…this is what the third time?….Anyway, this time I’ve resolved it! Feel like a new Malice. You will all see a new Malice. See Cheshire Cats….well we are a bit like Time Lords in that…Well that is neither here nor there…or over here…or over here! The main point is, I’ve missed you all terribly and I am dearly sorry to anyone that supported this site and helped it grow. I feel like I’ve let a lot of you down. I am not gone….I am not out. I will survive and preserver! So lets get this show on the road! Halloween Horror Nights starts…umm….this stupid watch *tap tap tap* TOMORROW!! HOLY SHIT ON A CTHULHU!! Well then we have no time to waste! Drag in the banner guys!
Halloween Horror Nights 24 starts tomorrow and I couldn’t be more elated! Oh my, the lineup this year is great: Halloween, AVP, From Dusk Till Dawn, Killer Dolls, Killer Clowns, people who are dead that eat you, people that are alive and eat you…SCAREZONES!!! YES!!! Oh my God, we have a return to scarezones. It’s about time. I guess all those subtle hints and messages really didn’t go unnoticed….
Bartleby: Eh Boss, you kidnapped the head guys intern and threatened to cut off digits until they did bring them back.
Your point Bartleby?
Bartleby: Well you made it to five fingers and a two nubbes….
Sacrifices had to be made…..Don’t you have the MORTIS to polish? Go do that….anyway where was I…OH
With a year this good it is going to be hard to pick a favorite. And they will all be good so….Well I’ll just give you my picks.
8. Halloween- Why do I pick this dead last? Not because I don’t think it will be good. I think it can be done very well. Its more or less this is going to be a house for fans with some jump scares. I really hope this one will blow me away. But…i’m setting the bar low.
7. Dracula Untold- Reign of Blood- I put this over Halloween based on the fact that it’s Dracula and has potential to be gory regardless. I have no idea about the movie and know nothing about it. I still give it better than jump scares.
6. Roanoke- Cannibal Colony- I’m putting this above the last two if not because it sounds very interesting. I will say the only thing that could go bad here is cannibals don’t scare me. We shall see….
5. Giggles and Gore inc- I like the premise. I have great expectations for this house. Clowns….and people being torn apart to make more clowns…i don’t need to give you anymore reasons than that.
4. Doll House of the Damned- Dolls are creepy as fuck by nature. Damn soulless eyes do it for you every time. So if this house sucks, I’m going to be very disappointed. It’s practically in the bag and just with the premise.
3. Walking Dead: End of the Line- I’m only putting this one this high up because its going to be the biggest that Universal has put out to date. Biggest house ever. It better deliver. I’m not alone in the fact I’m sick of AMC taking over HHN. The price of having Walking Dead is just too damn high. So…this one better be good guys….and the last one for a while….Next year I let Bartleby and Baxter eat the lot of them.
Bartleby: Yeah, we do like rotted zombie meat!
Baxter: But…I don’t think they are real zombies boss are they?
Does it matter?
Bartleby and Baxter: No not really!
2. From Dusk Till Dawn- This could either be shit or awesome. They already sort of did this with HHN 15’s Demon Cantina. So they can do this. They can deliver this. Even if it’s a cloned house from those plans I would be happy. Wish it was based on the movie and not the show…but hey…got to work with what you got.
1. Alien Vs. Predator- I may not be a fan of the original movie but the second one requiem was bad ass. This can be done so right. Xenomorphs are terrifying…and you don’t even have to see a damn predator to know it’s horrifying. I peg this to take it…Lets see how it goes.
Normally I would rank the scarezones here…but you know…first year they are back..I’ll just enjoy them. I think I’m going to really like the Purge Anarchy one if not just for the fact I’ll end up getting people. The people I am going with…all of us look like we would belong there. The scarezones are as follow: The Purge- Anarchy, Face/Off- In the Flesh, Bayou of Blood, MASKarade – Unstitched
October 23rd is when I will be there this year. Should be a good year. Will be meeting up with past companions The Legend Billy Fuentez and his lovely wife Margarita! We will be doing the RIP tour and living it up. So expect a nice review! I can’t wait! Halloween Horror Nights 24….BRING IT ON!!
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys!
My Cheeky Monkeys I have some very exciting news for you all!!! Hot off the presses!!! Boys bring in the pic!!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!?! AND I CANT MAKE IT!!!!! AGHHHHHH!!!!! Damn ministry of Magic is crafty and casted Anti-Vaporative spells over the parks….must of caught wind…hmmm…Anyway! This is happening and some of the details rolling out are awesome. So far one I’ve seen shows magic shop windows. Yes…now you will be able to use the wands you buy in the park. By finding little medallions around Diagon Ally…you will be able to try out a little magic and see how the other half of your kind does it. I’m just soooooo excited. The only thing better is visiting the Universe those stories take place in.
In other news…not so hot off the presses…some HHN 24 news hit last week. This one is bitter sweet…The Walking Dead will be heading back to HHN for the third year in a row. I’m not happy about this mostly because it appears the deal to get TWD involves AMC’s logo feces spread all over everything. The good part however is this years Walking Dead maze is supposed to be the biggest one in Halloween Horror Nights history. That could be interesting if done right…..Octobers still a long way off my Monkeys…
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
So the summer movies are still rolling out. While this review is late, i still feel it’s necessary. I remember getting up from my theater seat and saying to myself, “I need to put something out there because purist fan boys and girls are going to try to fuck this up for everyone.!” So far I’ve not seen a too negative of an impact. I could be wrong. I tend not to regard many people in high regard to their opinion on a film. Especially sites like Rotten Tomatoes (Sorry I know blasphemy! I don’t care!) Really all a review is for is just to give you an idea as to whether you will like it or not. Find a reviewer you share an opinion with and go with that. These mass review sites are no good because the internet, unfortunately, has no shortage of trolls that will try to slam a film because of an actress or because it’s a fad they don’t like. That is a travesty and is an absolute crock of bull shit. Stupid fleshly little meat sacks! Anyway….let’s take a look at this gran beauty called Maleficent.
Psychotik Review: Maleficent
So this new movie that Disney has brought to us takes the classic tale of Sleeping Beauty and turns it on its head. Don’t go into this film thinking that you are going to know everything about it. You won’t. This story starts a lot earlier than the birth of Aurora. Mostly because this is not about the princess. This is how the evilest faery became who she was. Maleficent is a story of love and betrayal. The film starts when Maleficent is a child living in the moors, the faery kingdom adjacent to a human kingdom. For years the humans hated the faeries and were not allowed in the moors. One day a human peasant boy by the name of Stephen tries to steal some gems from the faery world. The gems are recovered and Maleficent takes him to the edge of their world. They shake hands and his iron ring burns her. She reveal that iron hurts faeries and young Stephen throws the ring away. This act of kindness is so profound to young Maleficent that she starts to sort of fall for him. The two see each other for years and blossom a wonderful friendship. It furthers to the point when Stephen gives her the gift of true loves kiss….or so she thinks
Years pass and the two distance. Stephen tries to further his dream of one day becoming the king finding his way into the royal staffing. Maleficent becomes the protector of the moors and soars high over the skies daily. The king of the kingdom to the right decides he is going to find out what lies within the moors once and for all and attempts a failed attack. Maleficent and her army of what can only be described as large tree people, fight the humans back and hurt the king in the process. The king then decrees that anyone that will kill Maleficent will marry his daughter and become king. So Stephen does what any friend does and warns her. The two spend a glorious night together in each others arms….Oh yeah, and did I mention the part where he drugs her and then takes off her wings because that is really important. When she wakes up she is beaten, betrayed, and destroyed. The once happy protector of the forest now becomes an evil ruler subjugating the moors and growing her power. It’s not until the birth of Stephens daughter, Aurora, that the two face each other again. This is the part where she curses the child and storms out!
Now we are at the story you…..wait….nope Story still takes a left turn….more about that below…spoilers.
Dear Cthulhu, so many things are going right for this movie! I don’t even thing I can categorize it. The story, the casting, the music, the visual effects….just wow. This is a fantastic little ride that Disney has put together. The story is fresh…I like what they changed. The fact that Maleficent is drawn to the very child she cursed. That you get to see the duality of her character. You see her good and innocent…then you see her betrayed and wicked…then you see her come round again to just being a hero. It’s an interesting tale of the Hero that was also the villain. The fact this was a retelling I believe made it better. The fact they thought way outside the fancy box on this film is what impresses me most. Seeing her heart warm to the very thing she hates…was just awesome. Also I love that Disney is moving away from the princess being saved by a prince. The fact that True Loves kiss came from Maleficent. That True Loves kiss can come from a “motherly” character was the most impressive point.
Really there weren’t any I can think right off the top of my head. I loved the whole thing. It’s just good ride…go see it.
Nothing really horrible to say about this. So we have ourselves a 5 out of 5 Top Hats. Go right out and see it if you haven’t. It’s probably on its way out of the theaters, so quickly. Just a really great movie and I do hope Disney leeps continuing with films like these.
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
Yet another bit of poetry…hope you are all enjoying this to a slight degree…
That is what this feels like
Gone without a trace
Obliterated from the mind
Why am I the only one holding on
Holding my past memories so dear
What was once something to calm the storm
Is now a black poison in my veins
Everyone else able to continue on
No one looks back and sees what I do
The memories are all but gone
Gone to all, but to me, not forgotten
Everyone sees us as separate now
Like two individuals
Instead of one being together
Or perhaps they are just being too polite
So why everyone else looks forward
I’ll be the one looking back
Fill the needle up with that tar black ink
I will remember—and We will never be forgotten
You know those favorite thingies that get passed around Facebook? Well let’s do one here huh? Who wants to know some truths about me? Everyone! Great! But how many….hm….50? Should I? Shit…too late I said it. It’s go time!
50 Shades of Malice Psychotik
- Favorite Color Combo? Purple and Black…as if you all couldn’t tell.
- Favorite clothing brand? Tripp NYC although I have found a thing or two I love from Red Ball and Dragonfly.
- Favorite type of music? Metal/Rock
- Favorite guilty pleasure type of music? 90’s Pop
- Favorite Disney Hero/Heroine? Jack Skellington/ Sally
- Favorite Disney Villain/Villain-es? Oogie Boogie/ Ursula
- Favorite Disney Princess? Elsa (Chick is Classy)
- Favorite Sci-fi Movie? Back to the Future
- Favorite Comedy Movie? Ted
- Favorite Drama Movie? Moulin Rouge
- Favorite Action Movie? The Matrix
- Favorite Dreamworks Movie? Shrek 2
- Favorite Video Game? Final Fantasy IX
- Favorite Game Console? PS3
- First Person Shooter or RPG? RPG (Most FPS are abysmal)
- Fighting Game or Racing Game? Fighting (I’m not one for going in circles)
- Sports Game or Party Game? Party Game (I tell you this is close…because either way you end up hating your friends)
- Favorite DC Comics Hero/Heroine? Batman/ (Can’t think of one female hero worth mentioning…)
- Favorite DC Villain/Villain-es? The Joker/ Harley Quinn
- Favorite Marvel Hero/ Heroine? Deadpool/ Rogue
- Favorite Marvel Villain/Villain-es? Green Goblin/ Phoenix
- Favorite X-men (Top 3)? Wolverine, Gambit, and Nightcrawler
- Favorite Band? Slipknot
- Favorite 70’s Band/Group? Kiss
- Favorite 80’s Band/Group? Def Leppard
- Favorite 90’s Band Group? I actually don’t think I have one….
- Favorite 00’s Band Group? Slipknot
- Favorite Pop Singer/Group? P!nk
- Favorite Pop One Hit Wonder? “Living La Vida Loca”
- Favorite Rapper? Eminem
- Favorite Soda? Baja Blast
- Favorite Adult Beverage? RUM!
- Favorite British Film? Shaun of the Dead
- Favorite Doctor Who Villain? Weeping Angels
- Favorite Car? 80’s Camero
- Favorite Mythical Creature? *Leans in close and whispers “Hail Hydra..”
- Favorite Monster? Vampires
- Favorite Cryptozoological creature? Big Foot
- Favorite Anime? Fullmetal Alchemist
- Favorite Manga? Hellsing
- Favorite Anime Character? Uchiha Itachi
- Favorite Animal? Tiger
- Favorite Book? “Long Hard Road out of Hell”
- Favorite Theme Park? Universal Orlando
- Favorite Theme Park Ride? The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman
- Favorite Classic Film? Dracula
- Favorite B-movie? Mr. Hush
- Favorite Cult Classic Movie? The Crow
- Favorite Director? Tim Burton
- Favorite Composer ? Hans Zimmer or Danny Elfman…its very close…
Here are a few smaller poems…just don’t see taking up a whole article for each….
Love to Despair
Soaring, Running, Leaping
Passion, Devotion—Destitute, Disengaged
Crying, Hurting, Falling
Stuck in the blizzard
Body gone numb from the cold
Froze still, No Way Out
There once was a boy from yonder
A relationship with a girl he did ponder
He asked for her hand
She left her man and–
Around Hell he now wanders
Hatred flows from my veins
A poisonous black
Causing my insides Pain
Makings my feelings lack
The worst for you I wish
You worthless piece of shit
Nothing but a silver fish
Leaving my life in the pit
You took from me life
A thief in the night
She was to be my wife
You knew it and did this in spite
For your sins you will pay
This is your destiny
Its coming your day
Karma is coming for My Enemy
Poetry was once a way I used to cleanse the soul. Well apparently I still have some cleaning to do. So for the next week or two expect poems and stories that aren’t to cheery….sort of doom and gloom…
I wish there were words
Words to Explain
The pain that I felt
When it all went away
The sorrow that crept in
The devastation that occurred
Like nothing I’ve ever felt
Like no pain I’ve endured
I’m so lost without you,
wading through a blinding snow
My life once had true purpose
Now I just don’t know
Never would have thought you gave me this
Such a perfect definition
But now that you are gone
I’m waiting to find my life’s direction
Which way do I go?
Do I back track or begin anew?
Keep moving at a slower pace
Like I’m neck-deep in glue
So lost without you
Cant face the storm
Can’t find a way out
Will this be my new norm?
Everyone tells me,
One day it will all make sense
That does me zero good now,
They aren’t stuck like this
Lost in a hopeless desert,
An endless sea,
A Fearsome White out
Is whats it’s like when you’re not with me.
So lost without you
I hope to regain my way
Do I charter a new course?
Or am I here to stay?
I know I was here before,
And something tells me I’ll live after
But when you chase a star and it burns
Now what do you go after?
I’m just so lost without you….
Alright this is the second time of me typing this Psychotik Review!! SO LET’S MAKE THIS QUICK!!!!
Psychotik Review: The Amazing Spiderman 2
So for the plot part how about I quote a website hmm?
The web-slingin’ wall-crawler hits the screens once again in this follow-up to Marc Webb‘s 2012 reboot of the series. Andrew Garfield returns as Peter Parker, who squares off against the villainous Electro, played by Jamie Foxx.
As the film opens, we find Richard (Campbell Scott) and Mary Parker (Embeth Davitz) stealing away with some crucial Oscorp files while leaving young Peter in the care of Aunt May (Sally Field) and Uncle Ben. Flash forward about a decade, and Peter (Garfield) is swinging into action as Spider-Man; having successfully thwarted the hijacking of an Oscorp truck by notorious Russian criminal Aleksei Sytsevich (Paul Giamatti), Peter ditches the costume just in time to meet up with Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone) at their high school graduation. Despite his deep love for Emma, however, Peter remains haunted by his promise to her late father not to get emotionally involved with her for fear that she could be targeted by Spider-Man’s enemies.
Meanwhile, young Harry Osborne (Dane DeHaan) inherits OsCorp and a deadly retrovirus from his father Norman (Chris Cooper), and brilliant but timid OsCorp scientist Max Dillon (Jamie Foxx) gets infused with a powerful dose of electricity while attempting to fix a faulty power circuit in the lab. Upon regaining consciousness, Max discovers that he has the power to harness electrical currents – the higher the voltage the more powerful he becomes. When a battle with Max in Times Square shorts out Spidey’s web-shooters, Peter goes to work on developing a more reliable model of his signature weapon while Harry grows convinced that Spider-Man’s blood is the key to his survival. Later, villainous OsCorp chairman Donald Menken (Colm Feore) steals the company out right out from under Harry, driving the vengeful youth to break Max — now Electro — out of the heavily-guarded Ravencroft Institute for a two-pronged attack on Menken and Spider-Man. The stage for that battle is set when New York City goes dark just as Peter declares his love to Gwen, plunging the wise-cracking web-slinger into a fight that could forever alter the course of his life. ~ Jeremy Wheeler, Rovi
-Fandango.com synopsis of The Amazing Spiderman 2
That about sums it up for you….now for an obligatory warning….
Now that is out of the way…Let’s start do my usual Pros and Cons.
Lots of Pros! Lot’s of things I liked about this movie. Don’t believe some of the critics. They obviously don’t remember Spiderman 3. People keep relating this to that because of the amount of characters and villains. People today are getting to used to a standard set up for a narrative or a movie. They can only focus on a handful of characters. I’m sorry this may come off as very crass…But the fact that you are incapable of dealing with a complex story, is of now fault to the writer, the director, or the cast in general. That being said I’ll isolate a few things:
- Casting: Yet again we have an awesome cast for this film. Andrew Garfield has cemented himself in my mind as Peter Parker (Sorry Tobey!) The first film still didn’t have me all the way convinced, this one he is much more confident in the role I feel. Emma Stone as Gwen Stacey is a treat as per usual. I really wished she was Mary Jane. The ending to this movie killed me (Even Gwen felt the same way…DuDum Tshk!) Jamie Foxx…wow…Such a good Electro. I loved the way Electro was written in the movie. That is another subject entirely, but I can just say that Jamie Foxx does what he does and delivers. Dane DeHaan was so good as Harry and Green Goblin it made me forget James Franco’s Harry Goblin (Something needed to dig that memory out with a spoon!)
- Story: The story was done very well. It’s rare to find movies like this with perfect pacing. The last one I saw like that was The Avengers. To see it done finally in a Spiderman movie was pretty nice. I enjoyed how unlike Spiderman 3. All the villains were not dumped on you all at once so you get to experience each one more than you would otherwise. Was very refreshing. Really it wasn’t like having three villains. It’s more like 1 and a half. You do get a fight out of Goblin and you see Rhino…but they are more a set up for the next act. I really didn’t feel they took away from the film at all.
- Musical Score: Hans Zimmer is a magician with a musical score. Combine that with the talent of Johnny Marr and Pharrell Williams, and you have epic results. I recently got a hold of the soundtrack and have been listening to it for a week. So many emotions from the movie told straight through the music. The Tracks “That Spider Guy”, “Electro Suite (Paranoia)”, “I Choose You”,”My Enemy”, “I am Goblin”and “Here” sum up the movie nicely.
- Visual Effects: So many things going right. The costumes are top-notch. The new Spidery suit is more visually pleasing than the last. Rhino being a big suit of armor was impressive, but…well we will talk about that in a bit. Electro was nice. It made sense…did I miss the green and yellow…yeah I did. But this was good. The Goblin out fit was a vast improvement over Harry Goblin AND Power Ranger Goblin!
- Rhinos Suit: I don’t know if this is a con…I just don’t know how to feel about it. I mean yeah the original concept of the Rhino is a bit outdated. But I like in the game how he is one of the human/animal hybrids. I can learn to love it. Paul Giamatti is one of my favorite actors. I think he played the part well. I don’t know…I’ll have to see how it plays out. I would have just liked it a little less more artillery and more brute strength.
- Gwen Stacey’s Death: SHAME ON YOU ALL!! EMMA STONE IS A NATIONAL TREASURE!!! I WANTED HER TO LIVE!!!!!
So the last con is not something real to bitch about…I give this movie a 5 out of 5 Top Hats. Come on people this movie is head and shoulders above the others. Spiderman 2 was really good, but this one held its own. Havent seen it, you should. It’s almost out of theaters.
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
Well the time has come! They have revealed a first look at Ben Affleck in the Batman out fit. I know this is old news! Kiss my furry butt! I present exhibit A…
There that’s better! Doesn’t it look cool? This is a little more like it. I mean I don’t know what it is about the Batsuit….it just looks better. And it looks like for once Batman wont be in a tank…which is a plus. By the way if none of you have ever noticed I really am not a fan of Nolan Batman. Way too grounded. The only good thing that came from those films was a Decent Joker and a funny sounding Bane. That’s about it. I can only hope they will juice a little more fantasy back into my beloved Batman (I doubt it but we can dream right!)
So what are my thoughts on Batfleck? Well, it’s an unpopular one for sure. I think he will do a good job. I’ve seen worst. (Batman and Robin anyone?) Truthfully Ben is not a horrible actor. He is just one of those that is guilty of being in bad movies. I don’t think he was what ruined Daredevil. I actually like Daredevil. I think a lot of the cheese comes from their era it was made. This was wayyyyy before they really started taking Superhero movies the way they do today. It was no worst than a lot of the action films of the day. I personally blame Jennifer Garners Elektra. Sorry Ben, but your wife sucks. I could go on and on about how bad THAT movie was. Cut the playground fight scene and a few other scenes with Garner out and you have a decent enough movie.
Am I wrong? Time will tell Monkey’s! Until then, try to keep an open mind. If you don’t that’s OK too. That is what the internet is for Baby….
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
Are you ready for this? Because it’s AWWWWWWWWWWWESSSOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMEEEEEEE!!!!
To quote The Miz….lol
So it’s been out for about a week but I love furthering news. Universal recently released some inside looks at the Escape from Gringotts ride and the Hogwarts Express ride. They look totally epic and I can’t personally wait to see them in person. The Gringotts ride is supposed to show you the events that unfold just after Griphook, Harry, Hermione, and Ron get dumped by the waterfall. From there you battle Bellatrix, The Dragon, Voldemort and other things….did I mention it is all in glorious 3D? Because that’s important….
Also, managed to find a look at the Hogwarts Express. I have to say when I first heard the rumor of this ride…way back before Wizarding World was open and everyone was speculating about the possibility of moving to Uni…I was interested to see how it would be done. Didn’t think it would be possible. Now I’m seeing it ready to be opened to the world. In the video they tell you about their being a unique experience both ways. They also talk about the possibility of having the actual characters on the train…I just want to see this happen already. I’m sick of waiting!
I’ll try to keep you up to date as I find some more. So far I’ve not seen an open date. I’ll check Screamscape later!
Until Next Time, Cheeky Monkeys,
So my Cheeky Little Monkeys, I was at Universal on Holiday a couple of weeks ago with the mini Psychotik. Had some real good fun. It’s changed so much since the last I was there back at HHN. I was impressed at the progress that was made on the City Walk. Lots of new things springing up all over the place. We got to see the new Beetlejuice Graveyard Mash Up show. It was amazing. The new Diagon Ally area is looking so swell. You can see a lot of things are finished. I didn’t get to visit MegaCon this year. It was so crazy busy we got stuck on I-4 in a traffic jam for an hours and a half! But anyway, let’s get on with the review.
City Walk Construction
I’m very excited to see the big additions rolling into City Walk. I remember back a few years when they did some minor updates and tweaks, but this…this is a complete overhaul and new looks. Seemed like construction was going good. Very fast it seemed. It had only been a month maybe two since I had heard about the transformations taking place. I could be wrong. Pastamore had already been changed into the Red Oven. This new pizza concept looked a little better than Pastamore. I wanted to stop in and see how it tasted, but time didn’t really permit the stop. I did see the new Cold Stone up and busy. A few of the other places looked like they were coming nicely such as Anajito’s, The Universal Studio Store rebuild, The expansion to Margaritaville, and the new Starbucks. I didn’t get a good look at some of the others like Bread Box, Hot Dog Hall of Fame, or Cowfish. I think when this is all done, it’s going to look fantastic. I’m sure by now the Starbucks and a few other minor projects are done. Like I said, construction was moving very fast.
Cabana Bay Resort
Well, while we were there it was still getting some finishing touches, but from what i saw it looked great. The Cabana Bay is actually now up and running. It opened a week or two after we left. Would have loved to stay there as the pictures I’ve seen make it look fantastic. I will be staying there next year especially if the price holds. $100 bucks a night sounds like a lot, but your average cost for a hotel on I-Drive that isn’t on site is going to run you about $80 soooo…Yeah! You may not get the express pass that the other hotels give you, but you still get the convenience of being on site which is what I would like. Plus the whole retro thing has me totally sold!
Beetlejuice Graveyard Mashup
This was one of my highlights to the weekend. We hit it once a day for the whole weekend. Little Psychotik loved it so much. It was very refreshing to see the new show. It is totally more music driven than joke driven and a lot more fast paced. I love it! I have a video I will be posting below of the show. I thought the addition of Cleo and Phantasia would be a bit hoaky. Adding in Monster High style characters with BJ…ehh…But it was actually very entertaining. The two sets that I saw of each character were really entertaining. Thought about vaporating on stage and asking Phantasia’s number…but I think seeing a large top hatted gentleman appear on stage out of nowhere…would have caused a panic. And what kind of example would I be setting for the little one…using your powers in public…that’s just bad parenting! The best musical number I think in the whole show is the one between Drac and Phantasia. The whole Possession is 9/10ths of the law gag comes back and if strangely funnier this time regardless of being shorter. Over all…you all need to run out and catch this show. It’s totally worth it.
Diagon Alley/ London Expansion
I was surprised the amount of things I saw. I mean I guess the angles in Universal prevent them from completely obscuring a lot like they did in IOA with Wizarding World. Construction looks beautiful at this point. I’m super excited for this area. If you go to the Fear Factor live show you get a real nice looks right down Diagon Alley. It was still being heavely worked on through there, but it still looked amazing. From what I’ve seen on the concept art this area is going to quickly be my favorite and I’m going to love having both of these areas together as an experience. My cosmic friend Samhain and I promised ourselves to take a trip and do the whole experience. Shop for wizarding stuff, take a trip on the Hogwarts express, go to Hogwarts….we are nerds! Editors Note: Yes I realize as a Cheshire Cat I can just go to the real Hogwarts…I have been to the real Hogwarts…how ever it’s on thing to go to the real thing and see how that is and a complete other to live the adventure as you cheeky little monkeys interpret it!I think everone is going to have the best of times when this bad boy opens its doors. You all won’t want to miss it!
Mardi Gras 2014
We had a blast this year! The best I think I’ve been too. The little one had so much fun. I even got to catch one of the concerts. The theme this year was “Around the World in 80 days” so it was very much so Steampunk…which was totally awesome. All different modes of transportation where shown…ah you should have been there. I did manage to get pictures…however the sheer awesomeness of the parade drained my battery and I didn’t get the whole thing…poo poo. We ended up catching A Great Big World. They were surprisingly good. I enjoyed them a lot as did Jazz. Check out their music. They do the song “Say Something” with Christina Aguilera. They have a new single too called “Already Home” and another called “Everyone is Gay” Check them out they are worth it. They are easy listening. They are not hard at all, but they are good at what they do, and their music has meaning unlike a lot of bullshit that is out there.
New Dinning Plan
So i found out that the Meal Deal is gone…which is sad. However the new prepaid meal service isn’t to shabby either. It’s a way I could see totally controlling cost and still very much so worth it if you plan it right. Now I didn’t use the fancy expensive one. They do offer one that is a bit on the pricey side but would be perfect if you were on a date with a fancy lady or just had a lot of money. That one includes a snack, an extra drink, a quick service meal and drink, and a sit down fancy restaurant meal. The one that my little companion and I got costed $35 for the day for both of us. We both got a snack, and extra drink, and a quick service meal. The best values are if you get them at Mels Drive in at Uni and The Three Broomsticks at IOA. They also have a Coke Freestyle Souviner cup now. It’s cool, I wish i would have gotten it. Much better deal than the other cup. 13.99 for the day covers as many refills for the day at a Coke Freestyle machine. There is a chip in the bottom of the cup that tells the machine its ok to dispense. TECHNOLOGY!!!
Our overall experience was a great one. It was so great being there all weekend and getting to enjoy everything. All of the new attractions were up and running. It was the first time there with a pass for Jazmin’s Autism. Editors Note: I’m not sure if I have ever mentioned that before. The little Psychotik is Autistic. That is not to say she is not normal. Dad and Mom are far from it. Really she is just on a different wave length from everyone else. Really this is a conversation for another time, and I will revisit it.The staff was very accommodating and sweet as could be to her taking everything into consideration. Living in this town, you forget that there are people out there that understand the condition and work with it on a daily. Universal earned so many cool points with me. I can’t wait to see what else Universal has in store for us this year. It’s going to be great.
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
What is up my Cheeky Little Monkeys? Man it has been far too long since I’ve sat down and typed an article. I’ve been away far to long my dears. I’ve missed you all and want to get you all looking to me again for your daily special brand of 100% grade a Madness.
First, let’s get this out of the way. The matter of business I was dealing with was the seperation of Seras and myself. Sometimes things just fall apart kiddies. 800 years is a long time to be together with someone. It’s not easy to stay together that long. I just needed some time to process things. Memories needed to be filed properly etc…Anyway…I’M BACK!!!!And what am I going to lead off with?…MORE DEPRESSING STUFF!! Let’s just get it all out of the way because I want to mention it and then next will be a Travel Report from Universal Studios Orlando.
First order of business, Wrestlemania 30. We are 5 days removed and I still can’t believe it. I’m so…I don’t even know the word…shocked? Depressed? Flabergasted? On April 6, 2014…the Streak…ended. Now a lot of you would wonder why that would hurt. Especially a Cheshire Cat….I attach to things. The Streak was something that made people happy. It made people believe in an invincible titan. A Deadman…that couldn’t be put down. There are some that didn’t care about it. That believe wrestling is staged, I guess it is…but you know what…so are soaps. So are reality shows…You think Teen Mom, The Kardashians, Duck Dynasty are real? Let me tell you, if you could see what I see it would be just as bad as when the Streak ended. We all have our false realities and stories and this was one that was truly epic. When it happened…silence went over the whole crowd…I thought people were going to riot. The ref couldn’t believe it, Haymen and Brock couldn’t believe it…and the look on Takers face. He deserved better. That man gave you everything Vince and you….well frankly you took a shit on him. And Brock of all people…that disrespectful little shit. I won’t get into that…I won’t la la la la la! Anyway!!! I don’t think this will ever get to the Undertaker, but if it does…Undertaker…you were my first hero. You will always be the invincible Deadman in these eyes. Thank You! Thank you from the bottom of my soul.
The rest of Wrestlemania was good don’t get me wrong…but I’ll never forget when the Streak ended….
Next bit of sad news…the passing of Wrestling Legend and Hall of Famer, The Ultimate Warrior. The story just makes you sad. The man finally patches stuff up with Vince. Gets inducted into the Hall of Fame, shows up one last time on Raw…then drops the next day. What the fuck kind of luck is this? The Streak and the Warrior all in the same week…nay days apart! It has been a bad week to be a fan. Emotional as hell. My heart goes out to his family. The most I can say, is at least he got to enjoy that spot light one last time. At least he got to experience that again before he went. I’m sure it made him happy to the bottom of his soul. He looked it.
That being said…let’s start the madness machine back up huh? Let’s get this party back to full throttle eh? LETS MAKE THE HEAVENS TREMBLE AT THE FACT I’M BACK HUH!? Welcome to my Madness! This is a new Malice…with new tricks…Welcome to the Tea Party! THE MAD TEA PARTY!!!
Until Next Time, My Cheeky Monkeys,
I know I’ve not posted much as of late. I’ve been going through a lot as of late. More than anything I thought I could stand to bare. But right now I’m still going through it, and I just don’t think i can give things the attention they currently deserve. So until further notice the website is on a hiatus. I’m sorry you guys out there that wait for stuff and to any of the organizations/talent I work with. This just needs to happen, I need to get things right with myself first. I do hope you all understand. I may stay active on the Twitter if you want to head over there and follow that. Mt head is just all over the place (more than usual).
Until Next Time, My Freaky Darlings,